Loved You First Read online

  “I read it, thank you, Counselor. You did an excellent job. I’d prefer to hear from Mr. LeBeck directly. My question is, why did you identify these men, who a relatively short time ago you chose to protect?”

  “Stand up,” Rachel hissed under her breath.

  Frowning, Nick complied. “Ma’am?”

  “Was the question unclear? Shall I repeat it?”

  “No, I got it.”

  “Excellent. And your answer?”

  “They messed with my brother.”

  “Ah.” As if she were a teacher congratulating a much-improved student, Beckett smiled. “And that changes the complexion of things.”

  Forgetting all Rachel’s prompting, he took the natural stance. The aggressive one. “Listen, they broke in, busted Rio’s head open, shoved Rachel around and waved guns all over the place. It wasn’t right. Maybe you think turning them in makes me a creep, but Reece was going to shoot my brother. No way he was going to walk from that.”

  “What I think it makes you, LeBeck, is a clear-thinking, potentially responsible adult who has grasped not only the basic tenets of right and wrong, but also of loyalty, which is often more valuable. You will likely make more mistakes in your life, but I doubt you will make the kind that will bring you back into my courtroom. Now, I believe the district attorney has something to say.”

  “Yes, Your Honor. The state drops all charges against Nicholas LeBeck.”

  “All right!” Rachel said, springing to her feet.

  “Is that it?” Nick managed.

  “Not quite.” Beckett pulled the attention back to the bench. “I get to do this.” She slapped the gavel down. “Now that’s it.”

  With a laugh, Rachel threw her arms around Nick’s neck. “You did it,” she murmured to him. “I want you to remember that. You did it.”

  “I’m not going to jail.” He hadn’t been able to allow anyone, even himself, to see how much that had terrified him. He gave Rachel one last squeeze before turning to Zack. “I’m going home.”

  “That’s right.” Zack held out a hand. Then, with an oath, he dragged Nick into a hug. “Play your cards right, kid, I’ll even give you a raise.”

  “Raise, my butt. I’m working my way up to partner.”

  “If you gentlemen will excuse me, I have other clients.” She gave each of them a highly unprofessional kiss.

  “We have to celebrate.” Zack caught her hands. There was nothing he could say. Too much that needed to be said. “Seven o’clock, at the bar. Be there.”

  “I wouldn’t miss it.”

  “Rachel,” Nick called out, “you’re the best.”

  “No.” She tossed a laugh over her shoulder. “But I will be.”

  She was a little late. It couldn’t be helped. How could she have known she’d get a case of criminal assault tossed at her at six o’clock?

  Two years with the PD’s office, she reminded herself, grinning a little, as she pushed open the door of the bar.

  When the cheer went up, she stopped cold. There were streamers, balloons, and several people in incredibly stupid party hats. A huge banner hung across the back wall.

  Next to Rachel, Perry Mason is a Wimp.

  It made her laugh, even as Rio hauled her onto his shoulders and carried her to the bar. He set her down, and someone thrust a glass of champagne in her hand.

  “Some party.”

  Zack tugged at her hair until she turned her face for a kiss. “I tried to make them wait for you, but they got caught up.”

  “I’ll catch up…” she began. Then her mouth dropped open. “Mama?”

  “We’re already eating Rio’s short ribs,” Nadia informed her. “Now your papa is going to dance with me.”

  “Maybe I dance with you later,” Yuri informed his daughter as he swept Nadia off for what was surely to be a polka.

  “You invited my parents. And—” She shook her head in wonder. “That’s Alex stuffing meatballs in his face.”

  “It’s a private party.” Zack clinked his glass against hers. “Nick made up the list. Take a look.”

  She craned her neck and spotted him at a table. “Isn’t that Lola’s daughter?”

  “She’s really impressed that he’s been shot.”

  “It’s one of the top ten ways to impress a woman.”

  “I’ll keep it in mind. Want to dance?”

  She took another sip of champagne. “I’d bet a week’s pay you don’t know how to polka.”

  “You lose,” he said, and grabbed her hand.

  It went on for hours. Rachel lost track of the time as she sampled the enormous spread Rio had prepared and washed it down with champagne. She danced until her feet went numb and ultimately collapsed to sing Ukrainian folk songs with her slightly snookered father.

  “Good party,” Yuri said, swaying a bit, while his wife helped him into his coat.

  “Yes, Papa.”

  He grinned as he leaned toward Rachel. “Now I go home and make your mama feel like a girl.”

  “Big talk. You’ll snore in truck on the way home.”

  He leered at his wife. “Then you wake me up.”

  “Maybe.” She kissed her daughter. “You make me very proud.”

  “Thank you, Mama.”

  “You’re a smart girl, Rachel. I’ll tell you what you should already know. When you find a good man, you lose nothing by taking hold, and everything by letting go. You understand me?”

  “Yes, Mama.” Rachel looked over at Zack. “I think I do.”

  “This is good.”

  Rachel watched them walk out, arm in arm.

  “They’re pretty great,” Nick said from behind her.

  “Yes, they are.”

  “And your brother’s not so bad—for a cop.”

  “I’m pretty fond of him, all in all.” With a sigh, she brushed a streamer from her hair. “Looks like the party’s over.”

  “This one is.” Smiling to himself, he turned away to help Rio gather up some of the mess. If Nick knew his brother—and he was beginning to believe he did—Rachel was in for another surprise before the evening was over.

  Zack tolerated the cleanup crew for nearly twenty minutes before ordering Rio home and Nick to bed. If he didn’t get Rachel to himself, he was going to explode. “We’ll get the rest tomorrow.”

  “You’re the boss.” Rio gave Rachel a wink as he shrugged into his coat. “For the time being.”

  Zack shook a nearly empty bottle. “There’s a little champagne left. How about it?”

  “I think I could choke it down.” She settled at the bar and, aiming her best provocative look at him, held out her glass. “Buy me a drink, sailor?”

  “Be my pleasure.” After filling her glass, he slid the bottle aside. “There’s nothing I can say or do to repay you.”

  “Don’t start.”

  “I want you to know how much I appreciate everything. You made all the difference.”

  “I was doing my job, and following my conscience. No one needs to thank me for that.”

  “Damn it, Rachel, let me explain how I feel.”

  Nick swung in from the kitchen. “If that’s the best you can do, bro, you need all the help you can get.”

  The single glance Zack shot in his direction was explosive. “Go to bed.”

  “On my way.” But he walked to the juke and popped in a few quarters. After punching some buttons, he turned back to them. “You two are a real case. Take it from someone who knows you both have weaknesses, and cut to the chase.” With a shake of his head, he dimmed the lights and walked out.

  “What the hell was that?” Zack demanded.

  “Don’t ask me. Weaknesses? I don’t have any weaknesses.”

  Zack grinned at her. “Me either.” He came around the bar. “But it’s nice music.”

  “Real nice,” she agreed, going willingly into his arms to sway there.

  “Things have been a little hectic.”

  “Hmm… Just a little.”

  “I’d l
ike to talk to you about what I asked you a while back. About moving in.”

  She shut her eyes. She’d already decided the answer was no. As hard as it was to resist a half a loaf, she would hold out for the whole one. “This may not be the time to go into it.”

  “I can’t think of a better one. The thing is, Rachel, I don’t want you to move in.”

  “You—” She stiffened, then shoved away, nearly toppling him over. “Well, that’s just fine.”

  “What I want—”

  “Stuff what you want,” she tossed back at him. “Isn’t that just typical? After I clean up the mess for you, you brush me off.”

  “I’m not—”

  “Shut up, Muldoon. I’ll have my say.”

  “Who could stop you?” he muttered.

  Her heels slapped the floor as she tried to walk off her anger. “You’re out of order, Buster. You’re the one who kept pushing your way in, pushing your way in.” She demonstrated by making shoving motions with her hands. “Just wouldn’t take no for an answer.”

  “You didn’t say no,” he reminded her.

  “That’s irrelevant.” Facing him, she fisted her hands on her hips. “So, you don’t want me to move in. Fine. My answer was an unqualified no anyway.”

  “Great.” He stepped closer so that he had to lean over to shout in her face. “Because I’m not settling for you packing up a few things and coming by to play house. I want you to marry me.”

  “And if you think— Oh, God.” She swayed back, for ward, then pressed a hand to his chest for balance. “I have to sit down.”

  “So sit.” He nipped her around the waist and plopped her down on the bar. “And just listen. I know we said no long-term commitments. You didn’t want them, and neither did I. But we’re turning the page here, Rachel, and there’s a whole new set of rules.”

  “Zack, I—”

  “No. You’re not going to get me tangled up in an argument.” She was too good at winning those, and he’d be damned if he was going to lose this time. “I’ve thought this through. You’ve got your priorities, and that’s fine.” He grabbed her hands, hard. Rachel decided she’d check for broken fingers later. Right now, she couldn’t feel anything but amazement. “All you have to do is add one to the list. Me. I didn’t plan on falling in love with you, but that’s the way it is, so deal with it.”

  “Me either,” she murmured, but he plowed on.

  “Maybe you think you don’t have room…” His grip tightened, and he ignored her quick yelp. “What did you say?”

  “I said, ‘Me either.’”

  “‘Me either’ what?”

  “You said, ‘I didn’t plan on falling in love with you,’ and I said, ‘Me either.’” She let out a long, shaky sigh when his hands slid limply from hers. “But that’s the way it is, so deal with it.”

  “Oh, yeah?”

  “Yeah.” Perched on the bar, she linked her arms around his neck, lowered her brow to his. Amazing, she thought. He was as scared as she was. “You beat me to it, Muldoon. I was going to turn you down because I love you too much, and I wasn’t going to settle for anything less with you than everything. It’s had me going in circles for days.”

  “Weeks.” He brought his mouth to hers. “I was going to try to ease you into it, but I couldn’t wait. I even talked to your father about my intentions tonight.”

  Unsure whether to laugh or groan, she drew back. “You did not.”

  “I plied him with vodka first, just in case. He told me he wanted more grandchildren.”

  She felt her heart swell. “I’d like to accommodate him.”

  Something caught in his chest, then broke beautifully free. “No kidding?”

  And here it was, she thought, looking down into his eyes. A whole new set of rules. A whole new life for the taking. “No kidding. I want a family with you. I want it all with you. That’s my choice.”

  He cupped her face in his hands. “You’re everything I’ve wanted and never thought I’d have.”

  “You’re everything I wanted,” she repeated. “And pretended not to.” When she lowered her lips to his, she felt the sting of tears in her throat. “We’re not going to get sloppy, are we, Muldoon?”

  “Who, us?” He grinned as she slid off the bar and into his arms. “Not a chance.”

  * * * * *

  CONVINCING ALEX

  For Pat Gaffney, to even things out

  CONTENTS

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  CHAPTER 1

  The curvy blonde in hot-pink spandex tottered on stiletto heels as she worked her corner. Her eyes, heavily painted with a sunburst of colors, kept a sharp watch on her associates, those spangled shadows of the night. There was a great deal of laughter on the street. After all, it was springtime in New York. But beneath the laughter there was a flat sheen of boredom that no amount of glitter or sex could disguise.

  For these ladies, business was business.

  After popping in some fresh gum, she adjusted the large canvas bag on her bare shoulder. Thank God it was warm, she thought. It would be hell to strut around half-dressed if the weather was ugly.

  A gorgeous black woman in red leather that barely covered the essentials languidly lit a cigarette and cocked her hip. “Come on, baby,” she said to no one in particular, in a voice husky from the smoke she exhaled. “Wanna have some fun?”

  Some did, Bess noted, her eyes skimming the block. Some didn’t. All in all, she thought, business was pretty brisk on this spring night. She’d observed several transactions, and the varied ways they were contracted. It was too bad boredom was the byword here. Boredom, and a defiant kind of hopelessness.

  “You talking to yourself, honey?”

  “Huh?” Bess blinked up into the shrewd eyes of the black goddess in red leather who had strolled over. “Was I?”

  “You’re new?” Studying Bess, she blew out smoke. “Who’s your man?”

  “My… I don’t have one.”

  “Don’t have one?” The woman arched her ruthlessly plucked brows and sneered. “Girl, you can’t work this street without a man.”

  “That’s what I’m doing.” Since she didn’t have a cigarette, Bess blew a bubble with her gum. Then snapped it.

  “Bobby or Big Ed find out, they’re going to mess you up.” She shrugged. After all, it wasn’t her problem.

  “Free country.”

  “Girl, ain’t nothing free.” With a laugh, she ran a hand down her slick, leather-covered hip. “Nothing at all.” She flicked her cigarette into the street, where it bounced off the rear fender of a cab.

  There were dozens of questions on Bess’s lips. It was in her nature to ask them, but she remembered that she had to go slow. “So who’s your man?”

  “Bobby.” With her lips pursed, the woman skimmed her gaze up and down Bess. “He’d take you on. A little skinny through the butt, but you’d do. You need protection when you work the streets.” And she could use the extra money Bobby would pass her way if she brought him a new girl.

  “Nobody protected the two girls who got murdered last month.”

  The black woman’s eyes flickered. Bess considered herself an excellent judge of emotion, and she saw grief, regret and sorrow before the eyes hardened again. “You a cop?”

  Bess’s mouth fell open before she laughed. That was a good one, she thought. Sort of flattering. “No, I’m not a cop. I’m just trying to make a living. Did you know either of them? The women who were killed?”

  “We don’t like questions around here.” The woman tilted her head. “If you’re trying to make a living, let’s see you do it.”

  Bess felt a quick ripple of unease. Not only was the woman gorgeous, she was big. Big and suspicious. Bo
th qualities were going to make it difficult for Bess to hang back on the fringes and observe. But she considered herself an agile thinker and a quick study. After all, she reminded herself, she’d come here tonight to do business.

  “Sure.” Turning, she strutted slowly along the sidewalk. Her hips—and she didn’t for a minute believe that her butt was skinny—swayed seductively.

  Maybe her throat was a little dry. Maybe her heart was pounding a bit too quickly. But Bess McNee took a great deal of pride in her work.

  She spotted the two men half a block away and licked her lips. The one on the left, the dark one, looked very promising.

  “Look, rookie, the idea’s to take one, maybe two.” Alex scanned the sidewalk ahead. Hookers, drunks, junkies and those unfortunate enough to have to pass through them to get home. “My snitch says that the tall black one—Rosalie—knew both the victims.”

  “So why don’t we just pick her up and take her in for questioning?” Judd Malloy was anxious for action. His detective’s shield was only forty-eight hours old. And he was working with Alexi Stanislaski, a cop who had a reputation for moving quickly and getting the job done. “Better yet, why don’t we go roust her pimp?”

  Rookies, Alex thought. Why were they always teaming him up with rookies? “Because we want her cooperation. We’re going to pick her up, book her for solicitation. Then we’re going to talk to her, real nice, before Bobby can come along and tell her to clam up.”

  “If my wife finds out I spent the night picking up hookers—”

  “A smart cop doesn’t tell his family anything they’d don’t need to know. And they don’t need to know much.” Alex’s dark brown eyes were cool, very cool, as they flicked over his new partner’s face. “Stanislaski’s rule number one.”

  He spotted the blonde. She was staring at him. Alex stared back. Odd face, he thought. Sharp, sexy, despite the makeup she’d troweled on. Beneath all the gunk, her eyes were a vivid green. The face itself was all angles, some of them wrong. Her nose was slightly crooked, as if it had been broken. Some john or pimp, he figured, then skimmed his eyes down to her mouth.